And so the nursing saga continues...a couple of weeks ago, it seemed like Carter was a lot sadder than usual, and I began to wonder if it were possible that he was hungry. I had pumped plenty of times during our trip, and was pretty sure he was getting enough (3 oz every three hours). But this particular Sunday, he just seemed like he wasn't getting full and kept crying. So, I pumped again. And this time I only got about 2 oz, which I knew wasn't enough. And so I made up the difference with a little formula. Only I quickly found that 3 oz wasn't enough for him, either. After some trial and error, we have now settled into a routine of 5 oz every three hours. And he rarely spits up after, so I don't think I'm overfeeding him.
(To clarify: I pump every 6 hours. Usually I get about 5 oz total. I mix half with formula and save half for the next feeding. At night I nurse when he wakes up and then sometimes give him a couple oz of formula if he still seems hungry. I don't necessarily want to encourage the night time feedings, though, so if he falls asleep nursing, I just put him back in bed. Thanks Lara! I'm sure I will want to remember exactly what I did).
Now comes the dilemma...do I try to get my body to make more milk, or do I slowly start to wean him? And this is where I am very conflicted. If any of my babies deserve the extra benefits of nursing (ie the antibodies and health benefits), it is this little love who had such a rough start to life. Plus, he has so few pleasures in life, and nursing is one of them, I feel awful taking it away from him.
On the other hand, he has been so much happier since he is getting full, and has actually started sleeping at night (at least one five hour stretch!). Plus, I don't have to worry about whether or not he is getting enough and it is very convenient to make him a bottle while I do other things.
Enter Exhibit A: The Neglected Fourth Child
I was trying to get dinner made and the kids were playing the Wii, so I had to be creative. This only lasted a couple of minutes, and Allie came and took over for me.
Every time I think about what to do, I start getting anxious. It is a big decision to make. I just want to do what is best for him. And I feel like my negativity about nursing may be partly to blame for my lack of milk production. And I do my best to avoid making any decision at all. I continue to pump and mix it with formula, hoping that I will either suddenly make a lot of milk, and the decision will be made, or I will make less, and again, the decision will be made.
I try to tell myself that I AM doing what is best for him (and not just what is best for me), because he seems to be doing so much better. And really, isn't that so much more important than trying to force the nursing issue when I was already having so many issues to begin with?
But since it looks like formula is going to be a part of our lives indefinitely, here is something we get to deal with (warning: the following photo is a bit graphic in nature):
Exhibit B: The Blowout
The pooping has become very regular (once a day, sometimes twice, but one will be a yellow "breast milk poop") very green, and very large. Hence the reason I asked on Facebook for any tips on getting baby poop out of clothes. The overwhelming answer was Fels Naptha soap, which I am still trying to track down. I'll let you know how that goes.
Ultimately, I believe that Carter is going to be just fine no matter what decision I make. So maybe what is better for me is truly what is best for him. He doesn't seem to be complaining.
Meanwhile, these other two (plus Allie, who refused to be in the picture since she couldn't hold Carter) are so glad he isn't so fragile anymore. And even if they drive me crazy (Damon calls him "Tar-Tar Sauce," which bugs me, and Kyla can't restrain herself from unclipping his binky and blaming someone else), I am glad they love him so much.
11 comments:
So do you nurse and then pump or only pump and give him a bottle of breast milk?
First - I had good luck getting baby poop out with some generic spray n' wash (first)combined with Oxy Clean (sprinkled on top). You can get Oxy Clean from Costco. After doing this combo, I'd let the outfit sit in a sink of water over night. Then I'd just wash the outfit with the rest of my normal laundry, sometimes sitting a few days and it always came out.
Second, ahhhh the good ol' nursing issue. Had the same problem with Emma. Once I got over the media and self-inflicted guilt - I gave her bottles and never looked back. She was happier and I was happier. Think of the wonderful bonding time your other kids (and Jeff) will have feeding him. I hereby relieve you of your guilt. There. All gone. Lots of super famous and important people were bottle fed.
:)
yeah, I feel you on the nursing thing. I know there was a time where I was only pumping 2 oz. or so. Then after awhile my milk production jumped up as Crew got bigger. Sometimes pumping is lame because not as much comes out as when they're nursing. It's a tough thing though, because milk supply increases with a lot of water and a lot of nursing. When you're a mom to 4 kids, it's kind of hard to remember to drink 10 tall water glasses/day, or to have the time to sit there and let the baby nurse for an hour, you know!
So, it sounds like you're still on the fence, and that's okay. If you do both for awhile, that's totally cool. If you have the time to nurse in the morning and the evening and maybe once during the day, then do that. Give him a bottle other times. Maybe there will be a little more milk built up during those hours. I'm a supporter of nursing as long as possible. That's different for everyone (and every baby is different too--Dane didn't nurse very long compared to Crew and Tatum), so if you find that it doesn't work, then follow Tammy's footsteps and let him do formula. I mean, it's obvious that Emma is quite a genius. :)
So sorry to hear about the nursing dilemma. I had the same thing happen to me. My milk supply was dwindling plus Wyatt is not a big eater (even to this day) so he liked to snack on my boob instead of "eat." I didn't really feel the guilt so much but I just loved to nurse him. Long story long...he wasn't gaining weight so I had to supplement. He went on a nursing strike for a few days and then would chow the bottle. I would nurse him then feed him the bottle for seriously a month because I (not Wyatt) didn't want to give it up.
When he was six months or so I decided enough was enough. I tried to pump ALL the time to get more milk but nada, zilch, zero was there...okay maybe one ounce from both! My mom said, "The ultimate goal is to keep your baby healthy and happy with whatever or however you need to." That really helped me because maybe I felt more guilt doing the formula thing than I thought.
I "caved" and as my friend said, "went to the dark side with her." I got more freedom and actually it wasn't that bad. I got to buy a new purse/diaper bag where bottles fit better. Retail therapy is the best!
Although I wish I could have nursed for a year (what we all dream/wish, right?), I'll say that you gotta do what you gotta do. Good luck with this decision. It's a difficult one but no matter what you will do what you know is best for you. You gotta keep yourself sane.
Love that blowout pic! :) Actually, that one of him in blue smiling is the cutest thing I've ever seen. I'm with Tammy. Switch to bottles and don't look back. He will be fine. And it's not like you can't still snuggle him while you feed him! You can even take your shirt off and give him some skin! (I did both of those things, more for me I think, when I switched Annie over) but then once she learned to hold her own bottle, IT WAS THE BEST!!! Seriously, if he is a happier kid with the formula, let him have it! (Not to mention a little plug for allergies-- say something like the wheat or broccoli or tomatoes in your diet was bothering him a little, giving him some gas or stomachaches...then the formula has extra benefits there too! Love ya sis!
That blowout picture is hilarously disgusting! Fels Naptha is definitely a great way to go ... Harmon's carries it! Just bought mine 2 days ago for baby blowouts too! :)
this one's definitely a tough issue! if you choose to keep nursing, one thing that really worked for me is fenugreek. it really helped bump up my milk supply. 3 pills, 3 times a day. all natural. either way, i'm sure carter will be a happy healthy kid and i'm sure you will make the right decision for both of you!
First of all I never imagined we would be having a conversation about nursing...wierd! But since we are moms and since being a mom involves babies and babies involve nursing, then lets talk nursing. I for one have not nursed any of my babies...EVER! I never wanted to try with Eric so he went straight on the bottle from the first despite the demeaning looks I got from all the nurses (rude). When Anna came around I wanted to a least give it a try. She ended up having a severe protein allergy and was put on hypo-allergenic formula. So again, no nursing. Finally, Jaida, who is adopted and therefore had no choice but to take a bottle. Moral of the story: Your little guy will be fine if you switch to bottles and you will be happier cuz your hubby can get up and feed him at night! My kids are all healthier than most other kids I know. They rarely get sick. So don't feel guilty.
That blowout pic just had me laughing for probably a complete minute straight. My roommates actually had to ask me what was so funny. Someday he will totally love the fact that you have that documented. Can I come visit you soon? I miss you. I love seeing you, and I just think your family is so great!
PS...I was the 4th child & bottle-fed. I think I turned out ok, and I've never even thought twice about it regarding my Mom "neglecting" me or whatever. And it's true, some of my favorite baby pictures are the ones of my brothers feeding me :)
I didn't even make it to my goal of 4 months with chloee, but switching to formula has been the best thing with both of my kids. Breast is best for babies, but a stressed and depressed mama is no good for anyone!! We have been dealing with blowouts around here too lately! Yuck! Well, just know that whatever you choose will be what is best for you and your baby.
I have been in the same delima lately. I have switched to formula full time. I am even starting a little rice cereal once a day. I nursed 3 months which is WAY longer than I did with Jax.
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