Progression/Regression

With all the drama with Carter, I may have neglected the rest of the family a teeny bit. I know it's always an adjustment for everyone when a new baby comes home, and Carter's hospitalization probably really heightened the need to adjust.

Jeff went back to work last week (what a blessing it was that he had a week off during the worst of Carter's illness!), and his role as part-time babysitter has ended. That's not to say that his life has returned to normal (not even a new normal), because he was called to be the Executive Secretary in our ward. I'm excited for him and his new responsibilities, and I know it will be a great opportunity for him to serve, but it's not going to be easy. He has a LOT of meetings. And a lot of responsibility. Because he is now in charge of scheduling all the appointments for the bishop, we had spend FHE teaching our kids how to answer the phone. Mostly, I ignore the home phone, because the majority of the time it rings, no one is on the other end. The phone company thinks people are trying to fax something to our home number. It's quite annoying, and I decided that if an actual person is trying to call, they can leave a message. Or they can text me the way I would prefer.

Damon has been a little extra sensitive lately, crying over things that aren't that big of a deal. It makes Jeff crazy. To me, he's still little and has every right to cry, as long as he can get himself under control. He has been so good about keeping his room clean, and I have pretty much just assumed he was doing a good job. Yesterday I told him to change into a pair of jeans with no holes (he has 3), and he told me he couldn't find any. But because I had done laundry on Monday, I was suspicious. So I went to find out what happened. Under his bed I found enough clothes to do an entire load. And enough trash and other things he had collected to fill a garbage bag. So I spent some time getting his room "actually clean." I also got rid of enough clothes to fill another garbage bag (including 3 or 4 pairs of jeans with huge holes in the knees), so I hope that will help him stay clean.

Allie has really seemed grown up lately. Her drama has really been minimized and she is 100 times more helpful than she has ever been in her life. It's no secret that she has been my challenge for the past 4 years, and I have to admit that she has become so much fun. She loves to take pictures, which I rarely allow, but I thought it would be fun to actually have proof that I live here, too, so I let her take a couple of me with the kidlets yesterday. We talked about making sure that she didn't cut anyone out of the screen. I think she did a good job.


Of course, just as we see all this progress out of Allie, Kyla seems to have regressed. She decided a couple of weeks ago that potty training was overrated. Instead of using the toilet, she thought it would be fun to pee in front of the toilet, on the floor. She has done this a handful of times. She also thought it would be fun to pee on the rug. She has only done this once (that I know of), and she got in big trouble, so hopefully that urge has been squelched. When I ask her why, she says, "because I want to."


She has also shown other signs of having her emotional love tank a little empty (term from the Love Languages). She came into the room the other day with a steak knife and said, "I'm going to kill Carter!" That's a little hard to ignore. She took a loaf of banana bread out of the oven (using an oven mitt) and set it carefully on the table the other day, too. She poured half the fish food into the fish tank when I was trying to take a nap. Anything she thinks she can do, she does. I know it's because she is having a hard time with the lack of attention she is currently getting. I have been trying hard to do things with her, like reading with just her before bedtime in her bed, and I hope to see some payoff soon.

Carter is doing really well. He just loves to be held. Every day, I try to set him down (I have to at some point) with varying results. Most of the time, he cries. But every now and then, he will actually sleep somewhere other than in my arms. Currently, he is in the bouncy chair on the counter, with the dishwasher running. He fell asleep there when I was getting the girls lunch and I am scared to even breathe wrong, afraid that he'll wake up. He still spends most of his nights in bed with me, but did sleep for about 4 hours in his crib last night (after two different feedings), so that is progress.

And he smiled at me for the first time the other day. It warmed my heart like a pot of chocolate fondue. Since then, he has smiled at me about half a dozen times, and I know it will never get old. It seems it's a lot of work for him to smile, though, and he usually cries shortly after. Oh well, I'll take whatever I can get.

We wanted to do a comparison between Damon at one month and Carter. This is a picture (professional, obviously) of Damon:

Carter was wearing the same jacket, so we tried to set him in the same position for comparison. We only got one shot (and not even a very good one) before he was done. Still, it's kind of fun to compare.

Maybe we'll try again if Carter seems cooperative (doubtful). I think they look alike, but definitely have their differences.



I am doing the best that I can. Most of the time, I feel good. I love being a mom and I love four kids. And while the newborn stage is definitely not my favorite, I have really enjoyed it. And those moments that creep up where I feel like I'll never have my own life are easily squashed back down. Just don't ask me if we're going to have any more, because although I think I do want one more, right now is not the time to ask. The answer would definitely be no.

Everyone has been so incredibly great to us. I have realized that my "love language" is Acts of Service (I think Jeff's is,too, if you can believe it), so you can imagine how loved I have felt lately. Thank you, thank you, thank you to you all. Good has come (and will continue to come, I am sure) from this experience.