Transition to Three

Some of you have asked what it's been like having three kids, and while I still can't believe I actually do have three, there are many things in life that would suggest that to be the case. I have now been a mother of three for 7 weeks and here are some things that I have observed:

1. Chasing Allie around is not any easier now that I'm not pregnant anymore. I wish that weren't the case, but I still can't keep up with her. If I'm nursing, she takes full advantage of my immobility and manages to still find numerous ways of getting in trouble. For instance, twice in the past week I have found her in my bathroom trying on my mascara. I'd say she needs a little more practice (and a little more supervision).

2. The end of May is the worst possible time to have a baby. If Damon were still in school, it wouldn't be so hard to go places, but with all three kids, even the most simple errand becomes a major hassle. I had to go to the post office to pick up a package for Jeff and inevitably had to wait in a long line. I was holding Kyla, which left Allie free to roam, choosing the packing material she would most like to have, and throwing it all on the floor. All I could do was say, "Damon, please pick that up and put it back," but in my head I was thinking something a lot less nice. By the time we got out of there, I know everyone else in line was thinking that they wouldn't trade places with me for anything.

Another time, while filling out a money order for Kyla's birth certificate, Allie managed to fall on her head as she tried to climb out of the back of the shopping cart. She was more embarrassed than anything (and I had three different employees offer me ice, as though they were worried I might try to sue the store), but once I saw that there was no blood, all I could do was shake my head in disbelief.

3. Damon doesn't get nearly as much attention as he deserves. At least, that's what his behavior would suggest. He has always been a bit of a worrier (as you saw in the spaceship clip), but lately he has been more anxious than usual, and I think it must have something to do with the baby. He started crying when we couldn't find Jeff in Circuit City (although I repeatedly tried to assure him that he hadn't left the store), he started crying when our van wouldn't start, and he started crying when he had to go to primary without me, as I was still nursing in the mother's lounge. It's frustrating, but I'm trying to be understanding. He doesn't get as much one-on-one time, and even when he does, Kyla is usually only seconds away from crying. I try to read with him every day while Allie is napping (in other words, locked in her room), and at least half the time Kyla does more vocalizing than Damon does. He doesn't take any of his frustrations out on her, thankfully, but I think he still has them.

4. Kyla, unfortunately, often gets ignored. Why is that she always seems to be fussy when I need to get dinner on the table? It's one of life's mysteries and my solution has been to let her cry. Maybe that makes me a bad mom, but I am trying to find a way to juggle it all, and I am yet to accomplish it. And so, if I can't get to her (and Damon isn't feeling like holding her for me), she sits somewhere comfortable and cries. One day I placed her on a wadded up blanket on the floor, positive I was going to come right back and get her when I finished what I was working on, only to find that fifteen minutes later, she had fallen asleep right where I had left her. This is highly unusual, as she doesn't generally sleep all that much during the day, but I know that part of being the third child that you have to be a little more patient with mom.

5. I have very little quiet time to myself. I am really looking forward to being able to establish a routine again once school starts. As a kid, I couldn't understand why my mom seemed to hate summer so much--there was nothing better than swimming every day, staying up late, and eating lots and lots of popsicles. Now, though, I realize why she was always so happy to see us go back to school; she could get back to doing the things she wanted to do, without having to worry about everyone else first.

For me, my daily shower is often the best part of my day. I can lock the door, and by so doing, lock out the rest of the world. I can't hear the kids crying and whining (or I can pretend that I don't hear them) and I can just close my eyes and imagine that I am alone. I never thought that one of my greatest desires would be to be by myself, but sometimes it is.

I don't know if all kids are as touchy-feely as mine, but if I am sitting on the couch holding the baby, it won't be long before all three of the kids are practically sitting on me. This picture of the kids and me is so typical; Damon laying on my shoulder, Kyla on my lap and Allie trying to make sure I haven't forgotten about her. Oh how I love my three kids, and I know I'll look back and wonder how I could ever have been annoyed by their constant presence, but for now, that is my reality.

To sum up, life with three kids is harder than ever, but it's also better than ever. We really do have a lot of fun and watching Damon and Allie light up when Kyla is smiling at them is priceless. I am anxious for the summer to be over, but I'm trying to keep in mind that the grass won't necessarily be greener (literally, as well as figuratively) at the end of August. I'm sure there will be many new challenges we'll have to deal with (potty training comes to mind), so for now I will just try to enjoy every moment we have this summer. And even though swimming every day isn't a possibility, and staying up late doesn't hold the same excitement it once did, I can still eat lots and lots of popsicles. And that's a pretty darn good thing.